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Saturday, May 3, 2014

the thrill of the unknown...

...always wears out eventually. is it still worth all the casualties? wish i could stay loyal in body and in mind.

mornings are the only time...

...i dont feel bad about being left alone.

the ass you become...

...when a joke escapes you, especially when it comes from someone you have been trying to impress.

the nightfall begins...

...so does my daily date with insomnia.

the array of fragrances...

...i see in front ask me if hedonism is such a bad thing.

the aroma wafts in...

...of the mutton bubbling away in the kitchen and i postpone my resolve to go on a diet for the nth time.

a visit to the torture chamber...

...called the beauty salon and got back with the question looming large in my mind: are men really worth it?

a languorous afternoon...

...spent wondering what keeps me in my current job.

i saw paris hilton cry...

..and wondered if salman and sanjay did too.

i become ugly...

..and vicious when im hurting most in love.

making babies...

...for all the wrong reasons.

two promises made...

...and the peace that followed.

an obituary in advance...

...in case i stop abruptly. i realise there really isnt anything to say.

ego must give birth...

...to regrets in old age.

breaking all rules...

...and ignoring my heart's own desperate plea, i spoke last night. it was undeniably one of the most difficult things i have had to do in recent years. i spoke because someone i barely know asked me to help him do something that was important. something that was difficult and something he was not sure he would get support from the outside world on. it took me an agonising two hours, as the heart fought a losing battle against the mind, before i could finally take a decision. i wasnt sure if i should, and even if i did, whether the demons from the past would let me speak. said yes almost at the last minute still doubting whether what i say would make any difference, but certain i could not live with the burden of knowing i could have partly healed atleast one scarred soul.

i was ready. ignoring my racing heart and clutching on to the table edge till my knuckles turned almost white, i strained to hear the lady on the other end of the phone say i was on. he said, 'hello anonymous' and i was on air.

a lunch with five girls...

...and all was right with my world.

when there is little left to say...

...i realise one rambles.

cheap imitation

she looks at him and kisses the other. he snuffs the candle with his finger and waits in darkness. she lets out a blood curdling scream as the vice begins to swallow her. he polishes his shoes. he sings. she flies in the air and falls on him. he feeds her food. she goes caramba caramba.

the fairy tale ends.

in eternity...

...for a moment.

dilligaf...

...is an acronym for 'does it look like i give a fuck' according to the urban dictonary. ha!

celebration

ben loved his life. there were ten more days left before he turned fifty. and he looked his age. his spirit however was much younger. his was a pleasant face that was devoid of any worry. he would always walk to work which was two blocks from where he lived. he would chomp on a hotdog and read the washington post as he clomped his way to work. he had a date with ann this evening and he was deciding between roses and lilies as also the movie they should go watch. he paused as he crossed st louis church and dialled ann's number. after exchanging pleasantries he explained he wont be able to make it as there was a friend from LA who was flying down and he had to go pick her up from the airport. she understood and said some other time. he didnt promise to call later.

nine more days. he cleaned up the house and wondered whether he should throw a party. he realised that would be too much of a headache and shrugged off the idea. he called his sister in canada and checked on the kids. she seemed to be in a hurry to get into a conference call and so he hung up. he decided to meet some old pals for a game of basketball in the evening.

it was weekend and just as well. his joints ached from the game the previous evening. he decided to go through his old collection of comics. garfield still had him in splits. he had bills to pay which he did. he took laila - his neighbour's mastiff- along. betty wanted him to pick up some eggs for her on the way back which he happily did. he stayed back for a cup of tea and indulged her in some harmless gossip.

a week more to go for his birthday. he suddenly realised he had always wanted to go on a trek before he turned fifty. he called ann and asked her if she would be game. ann had an important conference to attend during the week. he decided to call gloria instead. she would talk his ears off but what the heck. after fifteen minutes of complaining about him not calling sooner she agreed to join him and also chalked out the trip. he knew he wouldnt regret calling her. he packed his backpack and met her in the evening and off they left on a three-day trip. he left a voice mail on lydia's phone that he would see her at work on thursday.

lydia teased ben about looking drained which he met with a chuckle. gloria didnt look a day older than thirty and she was a wild cat in bed. he was glad he went on that trip for more reasons than one. he spent the day grinning at everybody he ran into.

time flew fast. tomorrow is the d-day. he bought expensive gifts for everybody in the office. he even picked up something for john the hotdog guy. he went through the neatly arranged documents in his computer and cleared his desk for the first time. he wanted tomorrow to be special. he has always wondered what the milestone would feel like. he was relieved he didnt feel depressed about getting old. his decision sixteen years back helped him live life on his own terms. surprisingly enough it helped him pull through the toughest times as also not yield to easy temptations. he again wondered about the party and dropped it as he wanted to avoid drama of any kind. he went on a long walk taking in everything his vision could hold. he didnt sleep that night.

fifty. he reflected back on the journey so far. as far as he could recollect he did not intentionally hurt anyone. he tried never to get involved with anyone in recent years for fear of attachment. he had learnt the hard way that broken hearts hurt bad. he lived his life to the fullest. he never worried about rising cholestrol or putting on weight. he never saved and lived like a king. he made hundreds of friends but looking back on those relationships he realised his presence in those lives was not life altering in any way. they loved him and he loved them. thankfully thats where it stopped. he thought of his family and smiled. god bless them. they were all leading their lives happily. he wondered whether they all had a plan. and pondered a while over whether they needed one.

he counted the dollars and wrapped it in the instruction note. he then placed it on the TV where it could be easily seen. he made the call and pulled the trigger.

i feel like my own ghost...

... in what was once my soul.

my words...

...that keep us alive.

i still regret...

...those words spoken to my father and these seven years havent helped much.

im sorry daddy.

im going back...

...to where i belonged. im done chasing dreams.

i cant remember...

...the last time someone asked me to sing.

a friend...

...a phantom illusion a parallel path.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

joy

the kids ran into their mother’s outstretched arms as she scooped up the youngest one, rubbed her nose on his tummy and threw him up in the air. his angelic face dissolved into cheery giggles and the soft curls framing his face danced in rhythm with his bounce in the air. his eyes sparkled as he threw his chubby arms around her neck pulling her close and planting a wet sloppy kiss on her cheek before melting into her. she held him close to her chest and smelled his hair as they all merrily laughed and walked towards the swing in the garden.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

maggi

my mom hasnt been keeping well as a result of which i now have full control of the kitchen and i have been experimenting with a variety of never-before-heard-of 'cuisine' till recently. today however, i thought of keeping it simple. bring home the plain ol yet divine maggi. i hoped she would give me a taste of the past i have been sorely missing since long.

she is very very special because it was love at first bite with maggi when, in a much awaited and celebrated day in my childhood, my grandmom treated me and my brother to the magic called maggi - we had only seen it in a commercial on our neighbours tv until then. it was an unattainable luxury both my brother and i had only dreamt of and salivated over, and we had to labouriously study to win ourselves a date with maggi as a reward from our grannie. hmmm...on second thoughts, i am not sure whether it was grannie or mom who introduced us to maggi, but that is not important. what is, however is that like any true love, my unabiding passion for this two minute wonder has only grown stronger over the years... not so much for its taste, as for the myriad memories it holds in its delectable curly twists. she is a true soulmate who has stood by me through solitude and company, slim and fat. little wonder therefore that i decided to invoke mother maggi to lift the sagging spirits of my own mom.

since i prefer to make all simple things complicated, i decided to take maggi to another level and give my mom a true gastronomic experience. gastronomic somehow doesnt read right here. why would anyone talk gas when it comes to appreciating food? i dont like the word. but lets consider gourmand. i like the tinge of grandeur in it. yes, gourmand experience. much better. gourmandistic? gourmandic? gourmandanic? gourmandareous? or is it plain simple gourmet? im too excited to get on with the maggi experience to bother even finding out. but you get the idea.

so hold your breath for an invaluable secret is soon to be revealed that promises to turn you all into true blue two minute connoiseurs..heres the closely guarded recipe for gazillions of those who always wondered how maggi is cooked but didnt know who to ask.

rejoice! party!! celebrate!!! you shall soon have the key to maggi's heart.

a quick caveat: i used my phone cam to take these pictures. therefore please remember it isnt a professional who has shot these with a DSLR. ok lets get on. shall we?

like any good great chef, let me start with the ingredients. i used two onions, a few cloves of garlic, five green chillies, peas and one tomato for veggies. i didnt want maggi to feel lonely.





i boiled the peas in salted water for couple of minutes





sliced the onions. i like to keep the slices a little thick. i dont know whats with me and thick..really.





i sliced (julienned?) the garlic and green chillies. i love spice, but you be prepared to dial the fire station if you cant stand the heat and still use as many chillies as shown here.





while i chopped these veggies (and also some spinach for dinner), i boiled three cups of water for two maggi packets. i also added a pinch of salt to the water. btw, im thrilled my cam managed to pick up the bubbles in the water.





and now ladies and gentlemen. the star of the dayy...maggi herself!!!!! fyi, this is the economy pack from which i used two slabs of noodles. and i suddenly had an idea (after having taken out the two pieces) that since this post was inspired by insanity, nostalgia and the years of yore , i should show a different side of maggi.





eat your heart out. my cam can shoot black and white pictures too. there she is - my sublime maggi. i realised the gaping end wasnt really looking pretty.





i got this one right. phew..did i tell you i get easily distracted? so back to the historic recipe. for me, today, maggi wasnt the only star. there was someone else who was equally captivating.





this pretty lil lady in the best of blush. i wanted to do justice to her striking beauty, which i think i managed to some extent given the equipment and skill constraints.





the lady in red was so pretty she even had the other lady currently in my house - my sisters german shephard - charmed.





here i have her mesmerised - all with a tomato. see? see? who would have believed me if i had told them without proof. anyhow.. back to the pretty thing in red.





alas. she has to go into the wonderful delicious maggi that needs our immediate attention now. slice the tomato...yes..THICK.




meanwhile i empty the masala packet into the boiling water and since i belong to the middle class, i do something - a habit which no matter how hard i try i havent been able to shake off.





i pour a lil water into the masala sachet... (what you see around the water filter tap is m-seal and in my finger nail is spinach and stains from some green plaintain i had peeled. dont you get any ideas now.)





swirl it around and add it to the boiling water. incidentally, i also do this with milk packets. reserve some masala, about half a tea spoon from the second sachet.





add the broken pieces of maggi





now..if you hadnt seen this picture here, but lets say in a galleria, what would you have thought this was?





as the maggi starts to bubble away in the pan, heat some oil in a kadai. periodically dunk in the curls to ensure even cooking. this is gourmandatory cooking remember? you cannot afford to slip up on such finer details. (i thought of saying girdle instead of kadai. i had the good sense to check out the word on dictionary.com since something didnt sound right about it. im ashamed to admit even griddle would have been incorrect.)





throw in the garlic and green chillies. stir fry for a few seconds...





add the sliced onions..stir fry on high flame for a minute...




the steam hit the phone cam lens and this is what i got. but i like the mystery in this picture...not to mention the delicate hues. mmmm...can you smell the onions and garlic?




now you dont want to fry the life out of those onions. leave some crunch on.





add the tomatoes...





and the boiled peas...wait! what have we got here!!





i earnestly appeal to the government that maggi be declared our national dish





alright you killjoy.. i mix it all up..





add a teaspoon of coriander (dhania) powder and a quarter teaspoon of chilli powder. yes i love chilly, do you have a problem with that?





add some salt and some reserved masala from the second sachet.





stir it all up. not for more than a minute. all this should happen while the maggi noodles have been put to boil. now i have a second masala sachet that needs to be flushed.





swishhhhh. it goes into the boiling noodles.





i use the same slotted spoon for stir frying the veggies as well as cooking the noodles.





throw the cooked noodles (dont mush it up) into the crunchy veggies. you could add capsicum, carrots and cabbage to the veggies as well. and forget the noodles and just have the veggies cos there would be a mountain load of them.





scrape the bottom baby. thats where the goodness lies





give it all a good mix and ready yourself to present her with aplomb





isnt she gorgeous?





my mom's brunch for the day. margaret thatcher.





oh btw i lied about the lady in red. she survived. i didnt have the heart to cut her up. here she can be seen joyfully perching on a jar of vegetable pickle my mom made recently. hear her crooning 'im alive'?





here she is saying a prayer for the martyr who bravely took her place. you realise i can do this all day.. but the noodles will go cold.





that is my mom happily toasting in the sun on the balcony. cucooned in a blanket too.





i take my precious maggi to her..wake her up





she cant figure out for the life of her why i was shooting a picture of her like she was accepting the nobel prize. the fact she had just been woken from deep slumber didnt help much either. i assured her it was just her hand (and more importantly my maggi) that i was interested in shooting.





thats the after-brunch barren look sported by my kadai. middle class value # 2 - dont waste food. not a morsel. though that isnt very different from value #1.





thats the tea that we chased the maggi with. i dont like tea. i drank a lil to give my mom company. aand just in case youre wondering about the lady in red...





i got her introduced to some fellas that i thought she might be interested in hooking up with. look at those chaps now..the lascivious rascals!





its a happy ending for everybody. burp. and amen.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

2500

it is a moonlit night by the private beach. he is everything she desires in a man - attentive, witty and handsome. she first met him at an office party. tonight she looks stunning in a short strapless black dress and he cant take his eyes off her. the champagne flute stands sentinel on the table. the music is what he selected for her. he still smells like heaven. the tenderloin steak is done to perfection and the melting mud pie awaits their attention. it doesnt seem like three hours. he surprises her with the diamond necklace as the dinner draws to an end. he takes her home and they make sweet love. she scowls in the darkness and wonders if his pretty wife would ever find out. its a week day and he leaves in the wee hours of the morning. he leans over to kiss her goodbye and it seems forever. she removes the '5by7' chip-patch and goes to sleep. phrenic marketing hits a new high.